SSI

SSI.....Supplemental Security Income.

And I finally got medical approval....YAY!!!

Another obstacle to my normal life hurdled!

But that doesn't mean it's all over yet. Now I have another interview.....financial, this time. To make sure I have no income or big bucks lying around. That's on Friday. I will be a mess, again, but hopefully, it won't last long. I have all the paperwork I need....I think....but will offer nothing unless asked for it. My brother composed a letter stating he has been giving me money to support me so I have that as well as bank statements. I hope they don't ask about retirement, as I don't have any information about that and I am not at retirement age anyway.

I will be moving in 10 days. Tomorrow, I have to hand in my security deposit and first month's rent as well as proof of renters insurance and utility account number. Again, I hope that all goes as planned....I want that to be ready. I have done SOME packing but I have to do more. Just haven't had the mojo to do it with everything else on my mind.

But I will have help with the move. My gentleman friend Steve has arranged to rent a truck for the day which should be plenty of time to get everything...or most everything...out of here. My bed will be a priority....I want to be able to sleep in my new place right away.

Then arrangements have to be made to bring the rest of my stuff down from Boston. Steve said he would help me with that, too. We have a couple options but have not settled on a definite plan. But I can't WAIT to have all my stuff with me again!

Its been nearly 3 1/2 years since this whole nightmare started and it looks like it MIGHT just be coming to a close. I can only hope. I am the queen of Murphy's Law so I can't relax until things are actually settled.

I am still seeing 2 men....Steve as a steady boyfriend and Jim as a friend with benefits. I had to let go of Alan. Seems he was having doubts and couldn't come out and tell me. Took 9 months for him to figure this out? He caused me more tears than I deserved. He said his life is a mess....well, I sympathize but I can't do much for him if he can't even see me. So many times we planned to meet and something came up. I was not important to him....and if he wanted to make his life better, he would have tried. I was as kind as I could be but I told him that I was getting MY life together and if he couldn't (or wouldn't) do the same, I couldn't hang around. I may have hurt him, but I have a feeling I was the one really hurting. I feel like I lost more than the possibility of a relationship...I lost a friend I have had for 20 years. But when a guy says maybe we are like "ships passing in the night", that tells me its time to move on. Even Jim said that he thinks the whole thing was tantamount to emotional abuse, even if it wasn't intentional. Perhaps. I may never know now. But I have enough problems in my life.....I can't deal with his. But I miss him and our correspondence already.

I have been thinking a lot about Ron lately....not sure why. I still miss him although the pain is gone. Sometimes I still talk to him. I wonder what HE thinks of ME now?

I hope to have more good news next time I write.

The song tonight is  "How Can We Be Lovers if We Can't Be Friends?" by Michael Bolton. Although, in Alan's case maybe it should be the other way around.  :(