Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Time For Living

I realize I haven't written since I moved into the apartment....nearly 2 months. So I figured it was time to add an entry.

With all the changes that have been happening for me, there are some others I need to face now....namely my weight.

I got on the scale the other day and I am up 10 pounds from this time last year. That's 20 pounds in 3 years. Doesn't sound like a LOT but I feel my clothes getting tight again and that scares me. So its time for some action.

I restarted at MFP....My Fitness Pal. If you have weight to lose and you have the determination, I totally recommend it. It's not a weight loss plan...its a place where you have your own plan and you incorporate it into their site by logging what you eat and how you exercise...what you do is up to you. I started there in 2012 and lost 50 pounds in 18 months. I have to admit I looked pretty good. But then Ron died and I went into a tailspin. I tried several times to restart but I couldn't do it....the mental demons were too strong. But a lot of that is behind me now and I feel I am ready to get serious. I know it won't be easy....it wasn't a cakewalk the first time but the longer you stick to it, the more likely you are to be successful. I am into my 3rd day and am doing well so far. One of the reasons I decided to write here was because I was getting cravings so I needed something to get my mind off of them and writing is great for that. 

I do enjoy cooking and I made myself a pot roast tonight....it came out delicious and its very healthy, too. Here is my dinner....


Low in carbohydrates, which is what I strive for with my diabetes. Oh, yeah....that's another reason I need to lose weight....getting off those diabetes, cholesterol and blood pressure meds if possible. Anyway, having my own kitchen is nice but I still need the rest of my stuff that is in storage to help with that. But I also ran out of my food stamp money too, and I need more spices for cooking. It will have to wait till next month. In the meantime, I have a few things in the freezer I can whip up....and leftover pot roast.

Next week the plan is to finally go to pick up my stuff in storage. My one boyfriend is actually going to take a few days off, drive up to my son's house, pick up a trailer to hitch onto his Tahoe and haul all my stuff home. When we get it here, I am not sure exactly how we are going to get it all up here but my brother from Japan is home for a visit (YAY!) and I know he will help, too. As long as the weather cooperates we might be able to handle it. But its a LOT of stuff and it is going take me time to go through it all. I will probably get rid of some things and donate others. But it will feel good to have it all here with me again.

My brother also said he would help with a bookcase I bought from a second-hand store....its still sitting at the store because I can't get it here by myself. The boyfriend said he would help with that, too. With any luck, I may have this place organized by the holidays and that would be special.

I also started doing some crafting and crocheting again. I found an $8, drop leaf table at a thrift store so I bought it and refinished it. Here is the before....


And here it is after....


I am pretty proud of myself....its exactly what I needed in my little eat-in kitchen. The chairs were mine from my old dining room set so they didn't cost anything. I did have to buy a sander, the paint, the stain and the paste wax but it was worth it.

I saw my psychiatrist a few weeks ago and he commented on the fact that I seem to be calmer...less fidgety... and asked if I thought seeing him once a month might be acceptable for now and if I feel the need we can go back to bi-weekly. I said that sounded fine so I won't see him until the 30th. 

The only major concern I have now is money, of course. I have to be very careful as most everything is going to bills. I have NO idea when I will get anything from Social Security so I have to budget for everything. I just paid the cable bill and I will pay the electric bill next. Then the car insurance is due and then the phone bill.....sigh....

And  I do get lonely sometimes. I DO get out and I see my boyfriends once a week or so but when I am here alone sometimes, I get a little sad. I want a pet SO badly but I am not sure if its practical. My psychiatrist seems to think I would do well with a pet and I agree. But its more money.....rent goes up and then there is a deposit. Will have to wait for now.

Rain is in the forecast....again. We can't seem to shake it. I sure am ready for fall. I am tired of night sweats and hot flashes. But it's going back up into the 90's again next week. I hope its cooler in New England....that's where my stuff is. 

I think that is most everything for now. The song this time is "Time For Living" by the Association. Very upbeat and hopeful....the way I pretty much feel. How time can change your life!